217.2 Aaaaand PREGNANT!!!!!

So. . . .Weight loss has taken a back seat these days because I am pregnant!  Yes!  The whole process of going through the Dr. Tague program worked and I am finally knocked up!  I'm 9 weeks along and as far as I know things are fine.  I go in for my first appointment with the OBGYN next Thursday, so I guess we'll learn more then.

I'm finally thinking to write in here because I have been reading blogs about the very deliciously sexy Tess Munster and how we need to love our bodies as they are and not buy into the whole "Body Currency" idea where you get life points, I guess, when your body looks a certain way.  Apparently, people are mad at Tess for skipping the "achieve the perfect body" step before getting signed for a top modeling agency and finding love with a really nice looking guy.  According to some, she shouldn't be allowed to live a full life until she sheds some weight.

Well, that's bologna.  I can tell you that I achieved my dream job (Elementary Music Teacher) and met and married the man of my dreams all while I was 260-330 lbs.  It was after I found myself in a place of happiness that I was able to drop over 100 lbs.  I hadn't gained the weight out of self loathing, and I didn't loathe myself because I had gained the weight.  I just didn't know where limits were in regards to food.

Now, as far as not buying into the whole weight loss game, I definitely did because I was trapped and I needed help. My body was literally breaking down.  Bad knees, low energy, fatigue, gross little varicose veins, etc, were all plaguing me.  Mostly, though, I wasn't able to fulfill my lifelong dream of having kids.  That was what really pushed me over the edge.  Yes, I was large and in charge and living life to the fullest, but bringing a baby into that body was dangerous.  Dangerous for the baby and for me.  SO!  Things had to change.

I am now down to 217!  I haven't been this thin since college and I LOVE it!!!!  Now, since I've gotten preggers, my boobs have swelled up and I have put on and lost some weight.  217.2 was my thinnest, but I have since gained 3 lbs and lost 1 lb.  I don't really know how much I weigh now and with what I've been eating, I wouldn't be surprised if I've gained a couple more pounds.

I don't want to use pregnancy as the vehicle to get me back to where I was, but I have to eat for the baby.  I need to find a balance.  While I loved myself fat, I'm really enjoying living in this "not as fat" state.  I know I'm still a chunkers to those who never knew me before, but I really love being able to move freely about places.  I love being able to look at a chair (any chair) and know I will fit in it.  It's good to know that if the chair breaks, it's not my fault.  It's good to be here.